Feeling sorry for myself..

Spent the day running around the house cleaning anything and everything I could find to clean. I can still smell the pinesol and mop n' glow. As soon as I finished, Jasmine managed to spill fruit juice on the floor so guess what sticky again. So happy!!



Our wonderful friends from out of town stopped over to say hi. They are such wonderful people, but I can't help to get jealous of her and how great she looks. She has two kids; a 4 year old and a 7 month old yet she looks amazing. I had a chance to talk to her and found out that she is juicing for breakfast and snack. Eating Lean Cruisine for lunch and dinner. She is also working out twice a day. She is in the army and has a weigh in coming up and has been struggling to drop her last little bit of weight before then. I undertstand our lifestyles are different as well as our environements, but still doesn't seem fair. Why is it that she has time to workout? Why is it that her body is happy with this type of diet and responding to it? I find myself cheating still and I know that is part of my problem. I guess you can say I am still allowing myself to use stupid excuses and feel sorry for myself. Still just doesn't seem fair. I workout EVERY night at least 45 mins. some nights closer to 55 minutes. Do I need to increase my workout? I am not tracking my meals like I should, so maybe that's what's wrong. I just don't know what to do. You would think after 7 weeks on this "diet" I would feel better about it and myself but after tonight I am not so sure. I feel the same or worse then ever before. I am worried about Tuesday's weigh in. The scale hasn't been nice this week and I just know it will show a gain this week. I have 5 weeks until our trip and still 5 1/2 pounds from goal weight. I am ready to lose those pounds plus set my next goal weight. I guess you could say that I am pretty depressed tonight and should go to bed. I am going to take my pills, wash my face, and hope for some positive motivation to find me in the am.  

1 comments:

  1. have you switched up your workouts? like if you always do the same machine or couple of videos then adding a new one in? or as counter productive as this sounds. stopping what you are doing for a week and then start again. sort of tricking your body. Ok so I don't have the best advice on this obviously but these are things that I know have worked for some, so I thought I'd throw them out there.

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